Surge 9
by Jay Bernard
Surge 9 - Jay Bernard
Surge 9
I went back to my mother’s kitchen: peas was soaking on the
stove and a lettuce was uncurling on the counter. A blue plastic
bag filled with fish was deflating. One of the eyes was pressed
against the side of the bag and seemed to be the only one that
noticed me. This kitchen:
the crack in the window; the spice rack with over a hundred tiny
bottles; outside, my brother’s underwear on the line – tiny boxer
shorts in the drizzle; the fridge with a poster for bonfire night
just gone, and a postcard from our aunty in Antigua, and a vase
of plastic flowers on top – ultra-violet blue yellow purple making
the green of the leaves seem quite improbable; beside it a small
shelf peopled by Erna Brodber, Gus John; the door to the
bathroom:
I know that the floor is cold; there are three coiled hairs in the
sink; a streak of toothpaste where my brother spits and never
washes it out; I know that the toilet seat is cracked; I know what
it’s like to come in here when it’s dark outside and turn the taps
and feel the whole house warming up; the gradual breath the
house takes through the wallpaper, the carpet, the timber, the
kettle, the dutch pot, the kippers sparking in oil, the television,
the toaster, the paraffin heater, and the first ray unencumbered
by the clouds that spreads its rose palm on the kitchen window:
I will be that for my brother and mother. I will be light touching
their faces as she guts the fish, drains the peas.
extract from the early version of ‘Surge’ published in Beacon of Hope (New Beacon Books, 2016), copyright © Jay Bernard 2016, used by permission of the author and the George Padmore Institute