A Gimbal of Blackness
A Gimbal of Blackness - Nii Ayikwei Parkes
A Gimbal of Blackness
for Pops
Night cannot grasp the swift flight
of wind, but blackens every tree
the air moves, paints them darker, pushes
them against the light, the shapeless
light that gives them shape to shift
before my eyes. I am often in the embrace
of night; I am myself a dark thing –
the kind that was once called boy when man –
that was born of a woman descended from hills
and a man delivered from boyhood by the sea,
a man now lifeless though he gave me life.
I am often in the embrace of dark thoughts,
in the dim grasp of memory, a bottle in hand,
reflecting the light of the moon. I recall
a can of Guinness left in a London fridge –
one my father bought but didn’t get to drink –
kept for me by a well-meaning aunt. And how
hard my throat shrank with every sip, how sharp
that smooth black liquid felt inside me, how hard
these nights that blacken me, broken with grief
for a man I loved, who can no longer grieve.
from The Geez (Peepal Tree, 2020), © Nii Ayikwei Parkes 2020, used by permission of the author