Disassociation
by Deborah Alma
Disassociation - Deborah Alma
Disassociation
Whenever he shouted at me
his spittle would fly out,
I would watch where it landed
with some fascination.
If we were in the kitchen,
I’d make a mental note
to get out Dettol spray
for after he had finished,
and I’d try to focus, as it shrivelled
and shrank, on where it fell,
but he was remarkable,
he could go on for hours,
and maybe sometimes I’d forget
and the kitchen never felt
quite clean after that.
I’d marvel at how fast and how far
it could travel, often to fly
and land in a perfect parabola
across the dressing-table mirror
in our bedroom and I’d see
how the light would shine through it
like tiny pearls strung along a woman’s throat.
Sometimes, and often,
it would fall on my face
but I did not feel that.
From Dirty Laundry (Nine Arches Press, 2018) © Deborah Alma 2018, used by permission of the author and the publisher.